Sacrifices

Just moments ago, I had a talk with my mom about my life moving forward.

Like always, whenever I bring up this conversation, she would start to give me attitude and wouldn't let me finish how I feel about it.

It usually just ends with her just pouting, but today, we made some progress.

One thing I brought up to her, which surprisingly she didn't panic, was possibly moving out of California. She gave me the "uhhhh, really?" look.

Then we talked about one of my best friends since middle school. She talked about how she saw that he grew up as years went on.

Back in the day when we would play catch every other day, play pranks and ride our bikes everywhere, he was always the trouble maker and getting into mischiefs. I, on the other hand, didn't get into any trouble (I think I didn't at least) because I was deathly afraid of my mom's rage when I did get in trouble.

As my mom was talking to me about my best friend and I growing up, my mind started to race with emotions.

I started to realize to myself that I was (and probably still am) selfish at times.

I recall this specific time where I asked him to get me something, which he did.
But when I think about the situation he was in now, I feel absolutely disgusted with myself. And the thing was, he never complained about it.

I hope he would forgive me for it.

After my mom and I ended our talk, I thought about what he has been through, what he's doing now and what he's going to do in the future.

As funny as it sounds, I am pretty jealous of him. But again, he sacrificed things he didn't want to and worked hard to get to where he is today, and I am very proud of him.

I thought about what my mom said to me tonight and looked at myself in the mirror (literally) and told myself that I need to make a change.

I took a huge sacrifice to go play baseball in Iowa. But you have to make bigger sacrifices in the real world, and I feel as I need to take a chance and sacrifice some things to make things happen for the better.

As most of my coaches said, "When there's a runner on first with no outs, YOU sacrifice YOURSELF with a bunt in order for big things to happen."

Time to make big things happens.

-Jun